Life Challenges

Relationship Issues

In this case we are talking about a couple who are together and they have found that their relationship is getting deteriorated by the day. There are various reasons this happens. First and foremost is if you have been living with together for many years then you might have had some fights with each other.  These fights have led to a bickering anger against each other. Another reason is that you might have said something very wrong to each other in anger and those words have hurt you badly. You just cannot forget those words and hence you cannot love your partner anymore. You or your partner might have done somethings which is not acceptable in a relationship and hence you have reached an end to the relationship. 

You have reached a stage where you do not feel the need for your partner and you wish you break apart. Well if you do not have kids then its easy to move on from each other. But if you have kids then they children will suffer due to your separation.

At a smaller level you keep fighting with each other for every small thing; just to give a kick to your ego and to make the other person feel inferior in front of you. Whether you fight or not, whether you win an argument or loose, whether the other person said sorry or not; these things do not matter much in the longer run. What matters is together have you had fun, have you earned more money, have you raised loving family, have you eaten good food, have you been to nice places and gigs? Life is like an ice-cream it is melting every second and if you do not lick the last drop of it you are loosing big time. 

We think life if very long but your body is getting older very fast; things you could do when you were in your 20s, you cannot do them today. Things you could do today like travelling etc. you wont be able to do when you are old. Your kids once they become adults you will never get back the nice family-vibes thingy.  So yes on a day to day basis you have a choice, either you can keep fighting with each other or you can both instead focus on improving your relationship and enjoy your family life.

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Feeling Hopeless

Watch this three shell game fraudsters setup  on streets to fleece money off people. They ask you to bet on where the ball is placed under a shell and you are asked to bet. You bet on it and you loose: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2pHE0PRyKfk This game is designed to make you lose. 

This exactly is the game, the life is playing with you. its fooling you around and the more you try to understand it the more you will loose. And then when you get tired to loosing in life; loosing hope and loosing confidence in people, system, world you start feeling hopeless, you feel lonely. Instead life is like a bunch of people travelling on a train; the hustle, bustle and noise and movements; and everyone is travelling towards their destination. One day or the other every one will complete their journey. The movement of people is completely random and if you try to guess stuff here and predict and try to make your moves it may not work that easily. The same is the case with life. 

You have to decide inside your mind what your goal is and keep an eye on the surroundings but do not get overwhelmed by the things around you. Soon or later everything will change, life is like the spokes of a wheel; it will go up (good time) and go down (bad times) many times during your life time. If you develop solid value-system then you can easily navigate the ups and downs of life.  People who feel hopeless and pointless; its because they tried playing a fair game and lost many time; very much like a gambler in the shell game. You are mired by  the psychedelics around us. Once you understand life is playing trick on you, you will change your tactics. You are more aware and alert; you will not easily give into life's drama yet keep your focus on your target. This is the reason people who have an aim, mission in life do not feel hopeless. Its because their mind is occupied with their target so they have less time to be consumed by the drama happening in the world.

Eventually everything is a zero. 100 years from now no one will remember your or even care for you. Whether you feel hopeless or hopeful, doesn't matter to anyone today or tomorrow. The only difference being sad today makes is that you accumulate the baggage of sad memories that you will retain in your mind. And 5 years down the line you will repent why you were so sad on this day and why you wasted your time; and for who and for what purpose. Apart from spoiling your day, your dreams, your hopes, your bright future this feeling of hopelessness and loneliness does nothing else.

 In fact, even today no one cares for you as much as you care for yourself. So be a bit selfish here, keep yourself before the world. Say in your mind "Do hell with the World, I am going to enjoy my day today. i am going to give my best today, I will work hard, play hard and I am going make the best of today all while enjoying whatever i am doing (work, play, laugh, fun, service, plan)." Say to yourself this line 5 times in a day; close your eyes, sit in a silent room, if you are alone at home say it out loud and if you are with others then just speak to yourself in mind.  Do this for 10 days and you will start feel more hopeful, positive about life. 

Of course there are many more strategies to handle this situation, which is a topic for another day.